Staying Open and Fluid  

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Most of us understand that when we judge someone, or someone judges us, it is a negative emotional experience. As a result, we naturally want to avoid being judgmental, but this gets confusing when we feel we have to suppress thoughts that could actually be offering us guidance. For example, we may meet someone new and suppress a negative feeling about them, thinking that we don’t want to fall into the trap of being judgmental. Later, though, it may turn out that paying attention to that thought could have helped us take care of ourselves or someone else.

It is important to learn to distinguish inner guidance, and having an opinion, from judgment, otherwise we run the risk of not listening to our intuition and not allowing ourselves to form opinions. Inner guidance and opinions both help us to interact more intelligently in the world, so we don’t want to throw them out in an effort to avoid being judgmental. Our intuition usually makes itself known to us in a flash, and often has a physical component—a flutter in our stomachs, sweaty palms, or a chill. When we use this information to help us navigate a situation, we always benefit. Similarly, having an opinion about a person or an idea allows us to converse about it in a focused way with intention. Listening to our intuition and forming opinions are both positive outcomes of our ability to interpret the information that comes our way.

When we make a judgment, on the other hand, we attempt to have a final say on whether someone or something is inherently good or bad. Judgments close us down instead of opening us up; opinions have a lighter quality and are amenable to change. Once a judgment has been made, there is no more conversation or consideration, whereas opinions invite further debate. Intuition guides us from moment to moment, but, unlike judgment, never makes a final decree. In other words, it is only healthy to be open to the information we receive and to allow ourselves to process that information. As long as we stay open and fluid, we can trust that we have not fallen prey to the trap of judgment.


This entry was posted on Sunday, September 7, 2008 at Sunday, September 07, 2008 and is filed under . You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments feed .


That is very true. For people who have never really learned to trust there gut, I think this is a hard task. I learned at an early age that my instincts are always accurate so I always trust my gut and I have learned to decipher what is me judging and what is me feeling....


September 7, 2008 at 1:57 PM

I'm a big believer in trusting your gut instincts. If I meet someone, I usually get an immediate feel for whether I will like them or not.

As life is short, I usually don't spend too much time on those I get a bad "vibe" over. At the same time, if it's someone I will have to deal with on a regular basis, I will try to find something positive to concentrate on about them.

Just because someone isn't your cup of tea doesn't mean there isn't something wonderful about them!

September 8, 2008 at 10:36 AM

I like your distinction between opinions and judgments. One invites futher debate and the other closes us down. I find that the more I work with intentional awareness and intuitve visuals the sharper my intuition gets. Those stomach flutters have progressed to actual answers I hear when I pose a question to my intuition. It's very exciting and fluid.

September 8, 2008 at 5:55 PM

I am sure this is great way to do things.

September 12, 2008 at 5:20 AM

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